A Midsummer Night's E! ve

So Last night was the Comcast Entertainment Summer courtyard party, which is one of two the loving corporate parent throws every year to placate their disgruntled work force. One employee, when asked if they were looking forward to this year's event replied, "Yeah, I finally get to drink what I'm worth." In addition to the copious amounts of free booze, the company also brings in a big name entertainer to do a brief set. The set is filmed, then hastily cut together as a one-off "summer concert special." This was my third Summer Courtyard Party, having had the good fortune to start my tenure at the company the week before it was going down in August of 2005. That was the year they brought in red hot Kanye West, who gave new meaning to the term "phoning it in." I don't think he even managed twenty minutes. This was mere weeks before his post-Katrina statement that "George Bush doesn't care about Black people" brought him even more notoriety. Last year's event was perhaps the best of the three. New E! golden boy Ryan Seacrest kicked off the event with a shockingly naughty "Fuck work!", and headliner Ludacris actually came to play and delivered a full 45 minute set. Which brings us back to this year's event. Sadly, Mr Seacrest seemed to have other obligations this year, so the big introduction was left to E! movie critic Ben Lyons, who apparently had decided that a grey sweater vest was the appropriate fashion choice for this occasion. I was pretty well lit by this point, so I don't really remember what he said, but eventually Lyons gave way to this year's headliner, hip hop diva and ex UPN star Eve. Sadly, her Summer Courtyard style was more Kanye than Ludacris, and I'm sure she didn't stay on stage for a minute longer than her contract required. She did, however, say 'fuck' a lot. The end of the evening's entertainment means the clock is ticking, as the company only allows the booze to flow for another thirty minutes before they send everyone home. Then the serious drinkers move on to the "afterparty" where they can set about the real business of the evening; hooking up with co-workers and then figuring out how to avoid same when they see them in the halls the next day. Unless, of course, you're like me, in which case you watch the games unfold for about an hour, and then use a company issued cab voucher to speed happily home to your fiancee.