It recently came to my attention that the 1986 Steve Guttenberg/Ali Sheedy vehicle Short Circuit is being remade. Will Mr. Guttenberg or Ms. Sheedy participate? Will the adorable all too human seeming robot known as #5 get a 21st century makeover? Will Fisher Stevens return as a wacky Indian scientist (dots, not feathers)? All of this remains unclear. For more info on the remake, see the post from Defamer:
Never one to sit on hot news when it comes my way, I forwarded this link to a few in my inner circle. The response was overwhelming, and opened my eyes to the damage that the seemingly innocuous comedy left in its wake. For the full story, I will temporarily hand over the reins to this blog to jeremy a. and ryan luc (excerpted with both gentlemen's kind permission):
Although it is often overlooked, the original Short Circuit is responsible for a certain pop/r&b crime as well: the theme song "Who's Johnny." Now most of you know that I am among the few (and possibly the proudest) Debarge/El Debarge apologists in the world. "Rhythm of the Night" (which was by Debarge, not El Debarge) deserved to break into the top ten, but some of their earlier modern soul efforts remain unjustly overlooked (though not by 90s rap stars, Notorious B.I.G. sampled "Stay with me". Now it's possible that Eldra "El" Debarge would have broken away from his siblings and embarked on a solo career without the theme to Short Circuit among his credits, but if he had not been persuaded to lend his sugary tenor to "Who's Johnny," thereby launching it into the pop stratosphere (or at least the top 20), then he may have returned to the bosom of his family in short order.But this was not to be. So what? How could this possibly compare to the utterly unbearable cinematic disaster that was Short Circuit, and don't make me bring up Short Circuit 2? Well, riddle me this. If El doesn't have a solo hit on that first record, he never has a solo hit. If he never has a solo hit, maybe Bobby Debarge doesn't die of AIDS in prison in 1995 and maybe none of us have to suffer with the rap career of Chico Debarge. Bunny Debarge, meanwhile, would have been well-served to have never left the group in the first place, as her 1986 record "In Love" is an abject abomination, valuable only for the ridiculous attire in which she elected to be photographed.After El and Bunny left the band, Motown kicked the other three brothers to the curb, leaving them despondent. Shorn of their principal talents, they recruited older brother Bobby into the band and cobbled together an ill-conceived record in 1988 in which they tried to cash in on their recently gained all dude status by titling it "BAD BOYS." Really, it just should have been called bad. Desperate now, two of these bad boys turned to the only economy still going in and around Grand Rapids: the crack trade. Bobby, the second-oldest brother (who founded the mid-70s r&b/funk group "Switch" with oldest brother Tommy whose first two albums are worth hearing, if not owning outright; Bobby also joined the three remaining brothers from Debarge on the 1988 tragedy), and Chico Debarge, the youngest (who, like Bunny, also released a solo record in the late 80s with comical art direction; unlike Bunny, he still has a music career; and unlike any of his siblings, the only Debarge not to be a member of Debarge in any incarnation and to be referred to by a nickname that is not a derivation of his given name, Jonathan Arthur Debarge), started dealing in devil rocks. Convicted with two accomplices of federal drug conspiracy charges in 1989 and sentenced to serve five year sentences. It is unknown whether Bobby contracted HIV from sharing needles, unprotected sex with women out of prison, or unprotected sex with men in prison, but, in the incomparable words of VIBE magazine: "After riding the heroin horse since his teens, Bobby died from complications of AIDS on August 16, 1995 at the age of 39." And for his death, SHORT CIRCUIT is to blame.So but for Short Circuit, we might still be seeing mentions of Debarge in TV episode summaries, such as the following:"After learning that Punky did not do her book report, Henry cancels Punky's plans to see her favorite singing group DeBarge in concert, a move that Punky vows to never forgive Henry for -- until Henry gets DeBarge to come to the apartment and tell Punky how important reading is."DAMN YOU SHORT CIRCUIT, DAMN YOU! NOBODY CARES WHO JOHNNY IS!!!
Ryan Luc responded to Jeremy's post with the following:
Who is Johnny? Who's holding Donna now? I hope that family finds someanswers.DeBarge's record label history is quite telling. After their earlyMotown years, the dark, late-80s, post-first-greatest-hits-compilationperiod was ushered in by "Bad Boys" (1987) on the Striped Horselabel--clearly a reference to the heavy drugs that would be theirimminent undoing. However, 1990's "Back on Track" appeared on thegospel label Truth Ministries, also home to artists such asAdoration-n-Prayze, so that gives you some idea of the company theDeBarges were keeping in that period. Clearly, this was a family in need of redemption.If a "Short Circuit" remake were to be followed by a remake of--orsequel to--"Berry Gordy's The Last Dragon," perhaps the curse would belifted. I think a letter-writing campaign is in order; send your pleas to harveyw@weinsteinco.com. Try to word your reques
t strongly, but avoid using unnecessary profanity.
t strongly, but avoid using unnecessary profanity. For more from Ryan Luc:
lobotcostume.blogspot.com
3 comments:
As you will notice in the above photograph, the promo copies of the Debarge Family CD tried to capture on El Debarge's fame by titling the group "the El Debarge Family." This surely prompted El to issue the legal equivalent of the 1982 Debarge hit "Stop! Don't Tease Me" to the other members of his family who were actually recorded on the record, delaying the eventual release, which was under the moniker "The Debarge Family." (I believe Striped Horse still owned the rights to releases under the DEBARGE moniker at that time.)
Every DeBarge best-of since 1987 has included "Who's Johnny?" Thus, DeBarge = El DeBarge = The El DeBarge Family = The DeBarge Family.
Did a third grader write this 'article'? Almost ALL of the information was incorrect. First off, Bobby is the eldest brother, not Tommy. Bobby and Chico were convicted and sent to prison in '88. Bobby entered prison HIV positive. Chico was never a 'rapper'; he sings. Your attempt at humor in this situation is pathetic. Leave the pro writing to the pros.
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